You may have heard that the world lost a treasure recently. Yes, “The Most Interesting Man” left mother earth on a one-way trip to Mars, leaving all of his worldly possessions and a few broken hearts behind.
Three years ago, we ventured into the Dos Equis “Masquerade,” at the Belasco Theatre, where we danced on all floors, ate peculiarly interesting vittles and shared cocktails with The Most Interesting Man in the World. Needless to say, that night left a very lasting impression.
Fast forward to the present…The Impact Plan partnered with Dos Equis, returned for one last gala event on a chilly Tuesday evening (May 3, 2016) with “The Estate Auction of his Coveted Collection” located at the stunningly beautiful Park Plaza Hotel on the outskirts of Downtown Los Angeles.
The evening's festivities promised a night catered to tingling the senses and, of course, stimulating the interests of all who attended. And boy did they deliver… The line to get in easily wrapped around the long city block as eager fans and supporters of the most interesting EVERYTHING, waited for the doors of the Park Plaza Hotel to open. Once they did we were all ushered towards the registration window where the Coveted Collection auction catalogs were handed out, which contained a brief description of the night’s events as well as details and photos of the very interesting items up for bid.
The coveted items consisted of an actual bow tie, worn by the most interesting man on various commercials, a parachute, a sculpted plaster bust of the man himself, an amazing etched and sculpted mariachi guitar, an old school brass diving helmet, a globe with a hidden bar, filled with Dos Equis lager and amber, a giant drum gifted by The Impact Plan and a MYSTERY BOX.
Since real US currency was useless at this event, unless you were tipping the bartenders or donating to The Impact Plan charity, the main goal of the night was to collect, earn, procure and/or pool as many “Dositas” (dollars, dinero, cold hard cash) as humanly possible within a short time limit.
Yes that's right, in order to bid everyone had to work hard for that money, by completing and solving a plethora of curiously interesting tasks and challenges, with the first one being the "URN it" challenge. This challenge, at the command of beautiful Cleopatra goddesses, required all entering guests to stick their hands deep into ominous looking urns for a chance to grab as many dositas as they could within 2 seconds. The aggressively bold were rewarded with bundles of 1000 dosita bills, while the meek were only granted a few.
First challenge, CHECK. Now what? As everyone ascended the long beautiful stairway up to the lobby bar for refreshments, one couldn't help but notice a weeping woman dressed in an extravagant black gown, strewn across the long stairway, whose sorrowful woes shrieked of loss and sadness. Many guests continued to walk by, unaware or unwilling to care, as the woman sobbed and whimpered. But once in a while an empathetic guest would stop to chat with the woman and ask what made her so sad and those guests were rewarded with riches in dositas.
The night had just begun and we all found ourselves surrounded by beautiful hostesses, mysterious experiences, a multitude of convincingly fun actors portraying various people that loved and lost the now-gone most interesting man in the world and plenty of cold Dos Equis beers. With the blink of an eye you could find yourself standing next to a stunning redhead in a full sequence gown lamenting about her riches, or possibly get stepped on by one of the 10 foot tall stilt-walkers, but if you were lucky, you were able to brush shoulders with the stunning emerald haired ex-lover of the Most Interesting Man, who was hungry and on the prowl to find another man to replace her lost love. And if you were charming or helpful with her task, your wallet would grow immensely as she dealt out $25K dosita bills.
My favorite moment of the night was bumping into a Russian billionaire friend of the Most Interesting Man who generously paid me (with dositas) to snap photos of him and some beautiful ladies attending the auction soiree.
Finishing a few beers to quench a thirst, it was time to explore the Grand Ballroom where most of the challenges awaited. Next challenge was a large scale photo booth entitled "The Royal Pose" where guests were compelled to channel their inner bourgeois aristocrat with elaborate costumes as they were invited to pose with the princess and her contortionist jester. Those with peculiarly interesting poses were showered with the royal riches and those who could make the princess laugh with a silly little joke, also received more.
With our dosita-wallets getting fatter it was on to the next challenge, the gastro-intimidating "Culinary Roulette," where only the bravest bellies would reap the dosita benefits for throwing caution to the wind and eating whatever covered platter landed in front of them. And with a whirl from the exotic headdressed beauty, the covered plates spun and stopped in front of uneasy contestants who were disgusted and shocked to discover that they were tasked with devouring crickets, worms, frog legs, alligator and animal testicles (NO THANKS). Needless to say, we decided to PASS on this challenge, because I'm here for the beer and the beer alone!
After surviving gag reflexes and churning stomachs, next up was the "Walk the Line" challenge where drunk, nimble footed individuals tried their hand at balancing on various planks, carrying a shoulder mounted scale-type carrying system and gathering various items off stumps of wood. Sound confusing? well, after a few drinks, i can tell you the answer is a resounding YES! And with a jovial tribesman carrying a stack of $25,000 dosita bills, it was no-wonder that the line for this challenge was long...very long...
Ever wanted to journey to Mars and play a game of golf? Too bad, you can't. Or can you...our next challenge was counting down to lift off with the "Suit Up For Mars" photo booth, where just as the name relayed, aspiring astronauts dressed up in full space suits and tried their best to emulate life on the red planet.
With all of the challenges being completed in the Grand Ballroom, guests were also able to retire to an outdoor smoking patio complete with acrobatic dancers performing dances while being suspended from strips of satin and metal rings, as a DJ played all of the best oldies of the early 90's and as you ventured back into the main Terrace Ballroom, it was intoxicating at how much energy and enthusiasm began to build. With only a couple challenges left, the main ballroom was the final place to get your last minute dosita-grabs. Stepping up to "The Art of Illusion" challenge pitted guests against a master magician and slight-of-hand expert who tried to slip any and all fast ones by the many watchful eyes.
With so many challenges and interesting personalities generously giving out millions of dositas to excited auction masses, the last and final challenge, the one that truly makes a difference, was "The Impact Plan." At this challenge it was time for guests to have an opportunity to give back, but this time with actual US currency as donations for a worthy cause and also to have one last chance to add to their dosita-riches. With your cash donation you were granted an opportunity to throw darts at the money giving dart board where every color meant you were a winner and many walked away filthy rich both in dositas and in karma.
And with a loud buzzer the challenge clock reached its deadline with everyone mobbing the auction paddle station where super models in white tuxedos eagerly counted out millions and millions of dositas in exchange for auction paddles for everyone hoping to win something. The line for the paddle exchange quickly turned into a mad house as hundreds of people waited with mountains of dosita cash bills tightly embraced in their arms. Kudos to the lovely army of money counters who all seemed to maintain smiles on their faces as many drunken participants begged and pleaded for their cash to be counted.
Finally the flurry of paddle exchange madness died down as the main event began. With the super smooth banter of our English auctioneer and his colleague, the energy in the ballroom began to runneth over as paddles began to fly high up in the air.
As the auction steamrolled forward everything started to sell and it started to sell FAST. First the bow tie...$1.2 million dollars...SOLD! Then the parachute...$800,000...SOLD! Then the sculpted bust statue...$2.2 million dollars...SOLD! gaaah the bidding and the selling, the screams of joy and the shrieks of anguish all pooled together into an anxiety swirled tornado of INTERESTING and EXCITING!!! to add more fuel to the feverish crowd, the treasured GUITARRA MAGICA came up next...$5 million dollars...SOLD! then the vintage diving helmet, the coveted item that had my eye, and even though my meager holdings of $900,000 dositas was surely not enough, once the bidding started, my paddle flew high up into the air, which didn't last long as the final slam of the auction gavel confirmed $1.1 million dollars...SOLD! Next up, The Impact Plan drum...$3 million dollars...SOLD! Then the globe bar filled with Dos Equis Lager and Amber...$4.4 million dollars...SOLD!
Finally, we were left with one, the last one, the only one. With the end of the night creeping very close, the last most coveted item was now being rolled onto the auction block, "The Mystery Item." Before us stood a chained up refrigerator sized crate with a stunning security detail of lovely ladies, as the crowd began to push towards the front. Most auction enthusiasts were completely busted and/or out of the game, with a small collection of dosita-millionaires left dead center of the ballroom as the bidding began. Immediately paddles went up and stayed up as the bids flew through the 100,000's and quickly ripped past the $4 million dollar mark. Slowly but surely confident contenders began to drop out.
The bidding continued at a feverish pace as it quickly turned into a very intimate bid-battle between three dosita-millionaires. Still the millions kept getting called as the paddles kept flying high, with the final slamming of the auctioneer's gavel confirming that the Mystery Item's sold price would be set at $8 million dollars...and with a dramatic and climactic end to an epic auction battle, we all FINALLY GOT TO SEE what was inside the box...
and with the end of the night upon us... the winning bidder, wearing his prize, and the rest of us, lifted our glasses to give The Most Interesting Man in the World one final toast...#adiosAMIGO!